WWMDS (What Would My Dad Say)

In honor of Father’s Day I wanted to introduce y’all to Don Schwab. My dad was a funny guy. He had a good sense of humor, but I don’t mean he was funny ha-ha. Please don’t think I’m saying he was weird, because I’m not. Don Schwab had a way about him that was different. I owe so much to this man. In the song “Leader of the Band” Dan Fogelberg’s chorus is, “…..my life has been a poor attempt to imitate the man. Oh I’m just a living legacy to the leader of the band. I am a living legacy to the leader of the band.” This isn’t odd. Most men would consider themselves an extension of their father. What makes my dad kind of unique is he had four sons. The four of us are very different, yet we are all like him. There is more, but I’m going to get to that later. My dad had a quirky sense of humor. He had 8 kids which seemed to inherit this. He had some great one liners. Now I know I was his favorite. But he always said he loved all his children the same. One of my sisters he once said this to. “I love all of you kids the same. But I have to try harder to love you as much.” And then there was the time where on the way home from school one of my brothers got beat up pretty good. He went into the garage where my dad was working huffing and crying and grabbed a bat. My dad asked him what he was going to do with the bat. My brother replied he was going to hit the guy that beat him up. My dad took the bat and said, “Don’t ever hit a man with a bigger bat than you’re prepared to have shoved up your ass.” Nice. Whenever one of us kids would do something stupid and dangerous he would always tell us, “the hospital is the second place I’m gonna take you.” The funny thing is dad didn’t always tell us where we were going first. We all knew. He told us several times. When we would act up he would always tell us he was gonna take us to Breckenridge. Why Breckenridge? “….to get my foot dug out of your rear!” (That was said in my best Don Schwab voice. I know all my siblings who read this knew what was coming). There is no doubt in my mind that my dad loved me very much. But in the back of my mind I was afraid he might really have to take me to Breckenridge. I just really didn’t care to piss that man off. But I wasn’t afraid of him. He was funny. He was kind of scary. But he was the most loveable and greatest man I ever knew. And compassion?!! I remember when I burned down the barn when I was about 8 years old while playing with matches. I really did feel bad. We didn’t have a garage at the time so all of my family’s dearest possessions were in that barn. (to this day siblings with old photo albums have pictures that are partially burned). I waited in my room for the wrath of dad that I thought might just be the end of life as I know it. He actually pulled the old, “I’m not going to spank you because I think you feel bad enough.” AND HE WAS RIGHT!! What kind of parent can pull that off? (a couple of years later he told me one of the reasons he didn’t spank me was because he was so mad he was afraid he might have killed me. Talk about control!) Dad died when I was 12. He had come home for lunch and told me to clean the garage. I was pretty pissed off because I had planned to walk to 7-11 to purchase a slurpee. My last words to my father were, “I hate your guts!” His last words to me were, “well I love you.” He and mom left and were in a car accident on their way back to work. I don’t dwell on my last words to him. I know he knows how I felt about him. In the twelve years I knew him he instilled values that I still hold today. In my daily interactions with people, especially my own kids I always contemplate WWMDS (what would my dad say)? My idea of right and wrong may differ from other people, but I stand by them. Just as he would stand by his. I’ve always considered myself to be a good father. I am because he was and he showed me how.

Now for the “more.” I was telling someone the other night of one of the greatest joys I have ever experienced. This is watching my son be a father. I see him act like me. I also see his son act like me. It’s really quite interesting. I see my father, myself, my son all in his son. The mannerisms are uncanny. When my son was talking to his son this past weekend, he was saying the same things I said to him. The same things my dad said to me. I really had to just sit back and bask in the glory of parenthood and grand parenthood. That evening we were at a party where several of my nephews were. I cannot tell you how taken aback I was when a new one would come in he would say hi to everyone there, but would hug me, my brother and his male cousins. We all have that “Don Schwab connection” I wonder what my dad would say about that?
Being a father is the single most important thing I do. It is important because it has a direct impact on how my grandchildren will be treated. Granted all the stories my children tell about me aren’t good. I don’t always make them happy with my parenting, but they cannot doubt my love for them. I always like to tell them, “you will have hundreds of friends, but I will never be one of them. I’m your parent, not your friend. I love you more.” I bet my kids use that one down the road!

Happy Father’s Day!!!!

Business Ethics. What?

I’ve had several companies come out lately to give me an estimate on a new roof. What a bunch of crooks. I guess roofers aren’t interested in their reputation as a bunch of ambulance chasers? I can’t tell you what a pain in the butt it’s been. Everyone wants to know how much the insurance company will pay, and that is what the estimate is. Amazing! I’ve started telling them I’m paying out of my pocket, and they start in with, “let me talk to you insurance company and I bet we can get them to pay for it.” People wonder why insurance premiums are going up. I had one guy come on in, pull the old, “let me call my manager” and ask me for a beer. I gave him one so he would stop shaking so bad while he was writing the estimate. I told him if he said the word “insurance” one time I would throw him out. He called me back the next day to tell me he’ll beat any price I’ve gotten so far, just let him know. He’d have to pay for it out of his own pocket, but I guess since he liked me so much (even though he just met me) he was willing to do it for me. What a great guy! If I had another beer, I’d give it to him. I had a friend of a friend come give me a bid as well. This is a guy who works for a roofing company, but he and someone else are going to start their own roofing business. I would be their initial client. Now I’m not opposed to that. I’m a businessman too. I know everyone starts somewhere. BUT….if I’m your first client, you better not be my highest bid. Mutt and Jeff came out next. These guys had a hard time with the ladder. If you can’t work the ladder, chances are the roof’s gonna give you some trouble. At least they were able to break one of my gutters too. The only thing these guys had going for them is they were both fat and bald. Who doesn’t love that?!!! One guy told me he was coming out that afternoon when he got off of his real job. At this point, I was kinda interested. He wasn’t able to that afternoon because of thunderstorms. He called to say he’d be there in the morning between 7 & 7:30. “Sure,” I said. In the morning he called to let me know he was stuck in traffic but would be there soon. About 8 he calls to tell me he’s outside my house but doesn’t have a ladder big enough to get on my roof. What? I still haven’t seen this guy, but really want to because this is the kind of Einstein that you have to see to believe. I’m picturing a heavy fella with bad teeth, smoker stench and a vocabulary only comparable to a rock. I’ll let you know.
I’ve also looked for engagement rings this week. Again, a bunch of crooks. I talked to a diamond broker who swore he had a terrific diamond for me with papers. I met him at a neutral location. What he had looked real nice so I suggested we go to a jeweler so they could give me an appraisal. I told him if the diamond was everything he said it was I was going to take it. Here’s the deal….if you’re selling a piece of shit, why follow the guy to the appraiser? Especially since it was so far away. The funny thing is, the appraiser (who I know) told me when they guy walked in the door he’s a crook and told me what I can expect to see in that diamond. That’s exactly what he had. Told me the guy had been there before. Of course you can’t hardly walk into a diamond store and expect customer service. I don’t really care to ever do this again. It’s a shame something as wonderful as getting married has to be spoiled by the greed and dishonesty you have to go through to get a diamond. IJS

What I want to know is, what happened to people who tell you they’re going to do something and actually do it? Or tell you they’ll be somewhere at a certain time and are actually punctual? I work with someone who has never been on time for a meeting (when he shows). What I really like is when he throws all the blame on me. “Sorry I can’t make it. Buddy didn’t send me the email.” Let me go on record as saying if we have a 2 pm appointment, I will be there at 1:45pm. I would like to quote one of my old bosses and probably the biggest influence on my adult and professional life. Gene Seaton once said, “We work from 7am to 3 pm. That doesn’t mean we come in the door at 7, that means when I come to the back at 7, you better already be working.” I’m gonna go ahead and quote him again just because it was the best line a boss ever said to me. “We don’t call in sick because we don’t feel good. I haven’t felt good since 1967 and I’ve never missed a day of work.” I also like to throw this in because his youngest son was born shortly before 1967. I now know why he stopped feeling good. Mean Gene (this is said with the most respect) told you what was on his mind. If you didn’t like it, that was too bad. He took care of business and he worked you hard. At times you may have thought he was just plain evil, but he would NEVER ask you to do something he wasn’t willing to do. And if anyone got in your way while you were doing his bidding, well, God help that person! (Reminded me of my brothers growing up. They beat me daily. But nobody else better not look at me wrong. I remember two of my brothers playing hacky sack with a bully who was quite a bit older than me once on the bus). Gene was all business, all the time. This is the refreshing kind of punctuality and honesty that I miss. IJS.
Roofer starts on Monday. I’ll let you know if he shows.